I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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