I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
