I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
