hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize