Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I AM VODKA MAN
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
