Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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