We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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