all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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