dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
