I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
