***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I have demons in me.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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