Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
