So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
