the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
