R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Come see our sink grown plant.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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