I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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