Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
