I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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