We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize