apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
