i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
