You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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