Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
FUCK WHALES
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize