I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
