love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
