Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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