Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
its liver damage thursday
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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