her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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