love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
