Whatcha textin bout Willis?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
