Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize