Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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