It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
