But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
