I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
