And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize