talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
