this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize