But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
