he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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