Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
