I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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