UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
