I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Randomize
