So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
