I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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