I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
