I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
