Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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