the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
